What Makes an Adolescent Tick

Everyone knows that adolescence is a difficult period of human growth and development. It is when the sudden influx of hormones creates physiological changes preparing the child to become capable of reproduction. In some societies or cultures, the ability to reproduce marks the individual as an adult.
This is not the case in the United States, because legal adulthood is at the age of 18.

Since puberty usually happens between ages 10 and 13, this leaves a span of 5-8 years during which the parents are still responsible for the emerging adult which we label adolescence.

Beginning Adolescence The hormonal changes create the adult body automatically and beyond the control of the individual.

The first indication is that the child starts growing taller.

Since growth is physical work, although adults usually don't see it that way, the tired adolescent craves sleep.

The ironical part of this is that the body releases growth hormones during sleep, so the individual is chronically tired from growing.
As any parent knows, a tired child is cranky and difficult. So are adolescents.
Accompanying growth are the secondary sexual characteristic markers we label as puberty.
Females begin menses, develop breasts and curving hips. Males experience physical arousal, thickening of the vocal chords and begin sprouting facial hair.

For males and females, these are wondrous and embarrassing changes which each individual must balance with increased responsibilities in school.
Students change teachers and are no longer accountable to one person during the school day. Teachers expect greater levels of independent work and task completion responsibilities.
Assignments are longer in duration which actually creates difficulty for adolescents distracted by the effects of hormones and their increased need for sleep.
Adolescence Usually by the early teenage years, full adolescence is in swing. They lack an appropriate "social filter" in their thought process; comments often result in social foot-in-mouth "disease" where relationships explode and they are clueless as to what caused the difficulties.
Common events trigger emotional outbursts, often inappropriate in scale and duration. Eyeballs roll whenever adults give directions or attempt discipline. Raised voices, swearing and insolence typify all "conversations" followed by sulking behavior, door slamming or isolation in their bedrooms.
Asking for permission to go somewhere or do something usually end in arguments punctuated with "why not" or "everybody else can do/go.
..
" when parents tell them "no". Older adolescents, usually males, may even get into physical confrontation or challenges with father figures.

Managing Adolescents The behavior management and discipline that worked with the child does not work with the adolescent. Not only the hormone and apparent physical changes are happening.
The adolescent is developing an adult thought process.
Just as they discovered the fantasies that were Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny and the Tooth Fairy when they were between 6 and 8 years of age, adolescents realize that adults (especially their parents) are not perfect and don't know everything. Their seeming challenges of "why" or "why not" are actually attempts to expose adult reasoning to them.

Unfortunately, most parents respond as if the adolescent is challenging their authority, and a power-control relationship develops that is not beneficial to either individual or the family as a whole.

The best way to manage adolescents is to walk them through your reasoning in any situation. Is it easy? Usually, but it is time consuming.

Consider the time you spend reasoning with them as time you spend teaching them skills they need as an adult.
Adolescence is marked by egocentric thinking and behavior (just as infancy and toddlerhood is but in different ways). Teenagers don't usually understand the ramifications and consequences of actions.
Parents are concerned with their children's safety and well-being.

Just because the teenager knows where (s)he is, his/her friends, and the environmental conditions affecting them all, the egocentric thought process presumes that the parent does also. Teenagers need to learn to think in terms of others' points of view. They need to learn to see beyond the obvious and understand the limitations of time, effort and money.
They need to learn that their trust can be inappropriate, that their safety can be compromised easily. They need to learn the step-by-step analytical process of determining cause and effect in social relationships, especially those when someone else is in authority and/or control. Decision Making Adolescence is a time when individuals want to flex their "adult" powers by trying their skills at decision making.

Unfortunately, the school curriculum does not deal with how to make decisions, and parents usually are not aware of the need or how to teach what they do automatically. Decision making begins with making choices from available options.
Again unfortunately, many people do not know how to discover their options. Since each choice has consequences, many of which may be unforeseen, and decisions imply long-range planning which usually escapes the powers of teenagers' egocentric reasoning, their decision making and choice making usually results in frustration, failure and emotional reactions.
Parents need to start teaching their children how to make decisions by having them make structured choices. From those successful experiences, they can help their children understand the consequences of actions and take the initial steps into making simple decisions.
Guidelines for teaching these skills can be found on the Parent Modules page at Parents Teach Kids.